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Lessons From the End of a Marriage

A “How to Thrive” Guide After Divorce

Exercises in Vulnerability

After divorce, we often enter a protective state, curled inward and walled off to the outside world. And without practice, we soon forget the critical skill of being able to be fully seen by another. And so that which was advantageous at first, eventually becomes limiting as new relationships cannot fully form when you areContinue reading “Exercises in Vulnerability”

Should You Believe Your Triggers?

I could feel it washing over me like a great wave trying to pull me under, both blinding me and choking me. My body went into full-on fight or flight mode, any rational thinking put on hold until the emergency passed. What was the emergency, you ask? My now-husband mentioned wanting to build a homeContinue reading “Should You Believe Your Triggers?”

The Importance of Feeling Safe in a Relationship

When you don’t feel safe in a relationship, your focus shifts from connection to protection. Instead of turning towards your partner, you’re turning inward or turning away in an attempt to avoid a sense of increasing danger. And relationship safety is often misunderstood. We tend to oversimplify the state; believing that as long as physicalContinue reading “The Importance of Feeling Safe in a Relationship”

Four Types of Marital Abandonment You Need to Know About

When I filed for a “fault” divorce (which, in retrospect, was a mistake), one of the reasons cited was “marital abandonment.” It was a clear call – he walked out of the house and out of my life, leaving everything behind in order to start a new life in a new state. It’s the textbookContinue reading “Four Types of Marital Abandonment You Need to Know About”

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