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Category: Gaslighting & Abuse

financial abuse

Forgiving Yourself

I’ve done some dumb things.  Some things I’m not proud of. And some that I’m embarrassed about.   I’ve made bad decisions. Followed by worse ones. And held tightly to […]

Past, Meet Present

Well, that was weird. The letter was on the top of the stack in the mailbox. It was a thick envelope, formal looking. Through the window, I read my old […]

The Pitch-Black Room

Heartbreak is a pitch-black room. At first, you’re disoriented. Confused. How did the familiar world become replaced by this sarcophagus of grief? There are no windows. No doors. Only darkness. […]

con

I Was Married to a Con Man

I thought he loved me. It turned out that he was more con man than confidant.  If my husband had been Pinocchio, his nose would have been a giant redwood. […]

PTSD divorce

PTSD After Divorce

Can you develop PTSD after divorce? When my husband left, I trembled for a year. That’s not just some figurative language used to convey emotion; I literally shook. For a […]

Understanding Projection

My ex husband accused me of cheating. Never to my face, maybe because he feared my response or because on some level he knew the claim was baseless, but to […]

Understanding Triggers

  Want more ideas and support on dealing with triggers?   Facing Avoidance We avoid because we do not want to suffer. Yet suffering then becomes the background noise of […]

move on ex

How Could They Move On So Quickly?

My ex-husband certainly wasted no time. He didn’t even bother filing for divorce before he married his second (I’m assuming here; there could have been others) wife. Among all of […]

The Pathology Behind the Lie

I don’t get spooked easily. But I’m spooked right now. Not because of anything imminent. But because I’m really starting to understand what kind of danger I may have been […]

narcissist lie

My Side, His Side and … the Truth?

One of the more infuriating responses I’ve received when others have heard my synopsis of my ex-husband’s actions that led to the divorce is, “Well, you know how it is. […]

Look Out For These “Red Flag” Phrases

I’d never do anything to hurt you. This is naive at best and a manipulative distraction at worst. In any meaningful relationship, the occasional hurt is unavoidable.  Toes are carelessly […]

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