Six Ways We Hurt the Ones We Love

My ex husband used to tell me, "I'll never hurt you." I knew it was bullshit. After all, the ones we love are also positioned to hurt us the most, even when it's unintentional. Yet even though I knew his statement was wrong, I chose to believe him. Because I wanted it to be true. … Continue reading Six Ways We Hurt the Ones We Love

The Cheater’s Playbook

cheater

My ex left behind a letter, typed and in duplicate, when he unexpectedly exited my life. That was followed a couple weeks later by a suicide (attempted) email, sent to both his other wife and my mother. Since I had no other explanations, I poured over those words for months, looking for answers. His words … Continue reading The Cheater’s Playbook

Five Surprising Upsides to Being Cheated On

Nobody needs to tell you about the pain of being cheated on. You're living that every moment. Instead, I want you to know about the silver linings that can be found amidst the ruins of the betrayal.   https://youtu.be/K6oVdtLfdEU

Understanding Projection

My ex husband accused me of cheating. Never to my face, maybe because he feared my response or because on some level he knew the claim was baseless, but to his friends and coworkers. After he left, I learned that others had been hearing graphic and disturbing stories of my supposed infidelity for years. He … Continue reading Understanding Projection

Do You Suspect Your Partner is Cheating?

cheating

Do you suspect your partner is cheating?   I laughed it off at the time. My then-husband had recently become enamored with a particular style of Calvin Klein boxer briefs after years of mainly going commando. Since I was off school for spring break, I took on the task of tracking down several pairs for … Continue reading Do You Suspect Your Partner is Cheating?