Understanding Projection

My ex husband accused me of cheating. Never to my face, maybe because he feared my response or because on some level he knew the claim was baseless, but to his friends and coworkers. After he left, I learned that others had been hearing graphic and disturbing stories of my supposed infidelity for years. He … Continue reading Understanding Projection

Do You Suspect Your Partner is Cheating?

I laughed it off at the time. My then-husband had recently become enamored with a particular style of Calvin Klein boxer briefs after years of mainly going commando. Since I was off school for spring break, I took on the task of tracking down several pairs for him so that he had enough to last … Continue reading Do You Suspect Your Partner is Cheating?

Three Reasons NOT to Seek Closure

I was good at coming up with excuses. I must send him another email (even though he didn't respond to the first two) so that he knows the impact of what he's done and it might prompt him to apologize. I have to contact the police about his bigamy because it is a crime and … Continue reading Three Reasons NOT to Seek Closure

Shame: The Silent Relationship Killer

In most discussions of the common relationship killers, the usual suspects are named: infidelity, finances, addiction, abuse, changes in external demands, or a growing distance between the partners. Yet, there is a silent relationship killer that often lurks underneath those commonly listed reasons and is a contributing factors to many reasons cited for a relationship's … Continue reading Shame: The Silent Relationship Killer

Overcoming Insecurity

insecurity

They come into my 6th grade accelerated math class with confidence,  believing that they are smart and capable. Few of them have ever experienced struggle in math and so, because of the nature of my course and my teaching philosophy, when they first encounter a concept that is not readily apparent, they panic. Because in … Continue reading Overcoming Insecurity