Why “Get Over It” is Misdirected We Wish We Could When we’ve been betrayed, we want nothing more than for the pain to go away. We try to bargain with it, under the desperate illusion that if we can just unlock the secret code, everything will go back to the way it was. Often, weContinue reading “After Being Cheated On: When We’re Told to “Get Over It””
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The 10 Worst Platitudes to Hear After Divorce or Infidelity
As soon as the divorce or infidelity is public, the platitudes begin to rain down from loved ones and strangers alike. They can feel so off-base and tone deaf in the moment, even when they’re coming from a place of care and concern. What makes these platitudes sting and what wisdom might we gleam fromContinue reading “The 10 Worst Platitudes to Hear After Divorce or Infidelity”
After the Affair: How Much Should You Talk About It?
The affair has been uncovered. The decision has been made to try to save the relationship. There’s a constant tension though – the one who has been betrayed feels the need to talk about it all of the time (“I want you to understand the pain you have put me through”) and the one whoContinue reading “After the Affair: How Much Should You Talk About It?”
It’s Not You, It’s Them: 10 Signs You’re NOT the Reason They Cheated
Even though our heads know we’re not the reason they cheated, sometimes our hearts can get confused. We wonder why we weren’t enough for them. We hear their words blaming us for making them vulnerable to an affair. And we even face accusations from others, accusing us of doing (or not doing) something that causedContinue reading “It’s Not You, It’s Them: 10 Signs You’re NOT the Reason They Cheated”