More, Please

Posted on by stilllearning2b

photo-182

My cat has developed a poor habit of late. She herds us towards her dishes and yowls incessantly, asking for more even though her bowls contain adequate amounts of food and water. It’s like she looks at them but doesn’t believe them. She can only be silenced by the sound of the food in the container where we store it. A simple mock pour will placate her for a time until she yet again demands more of what she already has.

It’s an exasperating habit, especially since she seems to be most likely to share her anguish between the hours of two and four. In the morning.

I don’t know what drives her need: fear? confusion? greed? dominance? Or maybe she just finds humor in making her humans dance.

The act, regardless of its motivations, drives me crazy. But I can relate.

There are times in my life when I exclaim that I do not have enough instead of seeing what I actually have.

“I don’t have enough time.”

Yes I do. But this sentence shifts the responsibility off of me and onto the rapidity of the earth’s rotations. Clever, huh? What I really mean when I use this phrase is that the purposed actions are not important enough for me to make time. Time is there. It’s up to me how I allocate it. It’s also up to me to learn to take responsibility for that.

“I don’t have enough money.”

This one is fear talking. I have enough money to live, to pay my bills and have some fun. What I don’t have is enough money to sooth my anxiety, a fallback fund large enough to quell fears about the future. I’m (slowly) working to build that fund, but in the meantime, I can work on the fears, many of which are rooted in unreality.

“I don’t have enough stuff.”

Yup, confusion talking here. It’s all too easy to get caught up in the idea that happiness can be bought. I find myself flipping through catalogues or fighting the urge to hit the stores when I am unsettled in some way. Material goods will only distract for a short time. Happiness can only be found within. And, the reality? I have the stuff I need.

“I don’t have enough followers/likes/comments/book sales.”

Let’s be honest. It’s nice to have people want to hear what you have to say. It’s nice to be appreciated. respected. It’s nice, but it’s also a slippery slope. It’s easy to get carried away with the numbers game, only feeling validated when they reach some ever-increasing quantity. The problem then is that you never feel satisfied with what you have.  I’m working on bringing my yogic mind to blogging and accepting what is rather than wasting energy wishing for more.

How often do we fail to see what we really have? How often do we wish for more than we need? Look at what you have before bemoaning what you want.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go. My cat is yowling for more food.

 

 

On the Menu: Pot of Veggies at the End of the Rainbow

Posted on by stilllearning2b

It’s been quite some time since I’ve done one of these posts. This whole fall has been a whirlwind of activity between The Jeff Probst Show and other spin-offs from the book, activities with friends, and marathon training. This weekend has been a chance to catch my breath before the next round of craziness begins next weekend.

It’s funny – I never used to cook much. But now that I’m used to it, I’ve missed the extended time in the kitchen on Sunday trying out new (or at least not tried and true) recipes. I’ve been cooking my lunches the last several weeks (I have to, or I don’t eat) but I have been relying on quick and simple dishes. Today I passed on my usual yoga class to give myself the gift of time in the kitchen.

My sweet potato, oat, and protein powder concoction that fueled my marathon.

I am still on my sweet potato ban after marathon training. Don’t get me wrong, those little suckers are a perfect (and cheap!) carb source for gluten free endurance athletes but they do get old after a couple months of daily consumption. Besides, I’m ready to go back to my normal, lower carb diet. I definitely feel stronger and leaner when I limit the carbs a bit more.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I started off early this morning prepping for one of my favorite winter soups: Eat the Rainbow Black Bean Soup from Fat Free Vegan. This soup literally swallows veggies. It is so filling and hearty despite being low calorie.

These are just some of the veggies that go into this soup. When I kept chopping, I swear my slow cooker looked at me incredulously.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I decided to add some tofu this time to up the protein factor a bit more.

I’m hoping the vegetable content of this soup alone will scare off any rhinovirus that happen to be lurking around. I like to pretend that the common cold is uncommonly afraid of spinach.

The soup about halfway through its five hours in the slow cooker…yum!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Since I had the time this weekend, I ventured to Trader Joe’s – one of my favorite places to get groceries that unfortunately is an extra 20 minutes out of my way. I squealed in delight when I saw that they had in their seasonal shipment of brussels sprouts on the stalk. Yes, I got some strange looks. They are more labor intensive to prepare when they are sold this way but they are much cheaper and way cooler.

I just love the alien look of sprouts on the stalk!

I decided to keep it simple. After de-stalking (reminds me of defrocking and makes me giggle!) the little cabbages, I cut them in half and tossed them with balsamic, olive oil, garlic powder, and salt and pepper. I then roasted them at 400 degrees for just over 20 minutes until the leaves were perfectly crispy-black.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I have to admit. I have a strange addiction to these things. As I was attempting to pack them into five containers for my lunch, I kept sneaking bites. I ended up eating almost 1/2 pound of sprouts. Between those and my usual kale and spinach breakfast smoothie, I had more cruciferous veggies before 10:00 a.m. than most people probably eat in a week!

Here’s my addiction – roasted brussels sprouts. I love the sweet and salty crunch of the blackened leaves.

What’s for dessert, you ask? I usually just have an apple or some (gack!) sweet potato, but I decided to make something a bit more special this week. I like to that especially around the holidays as it keeps me from feeling deprived around all of the sweets that invade the school.

I decided to make the Grain-Free Carrot Cake from Ask Georgie. It. Is. Amazing. Stupendous. Unbelievable. Not only will I not feel deprived this week, but I bet others will be envious of my sweets!

Gluten and grain free carrot cake. Nuff said.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The craziness of the last few weeks has been wonderful and exciting but it feels amazing to be home and enjoying the restorative simplicity of preparing food that nourishes my body.

And now for some not-so-healthy veggie nachos and some NFL. Go Ravens and Falcons! Let those birds fly:)

Done Bun Can’t Be Undone

Posted on by stilllearning2b
Hot Buns - please pre-order
(Photo credit: ecstaticist)

I have always been a huge fan of Stephen King. He has a magical way of delving into the wonderment and wisdom inherent in the ten-year-old’s mind which paints a world we all remember yet no longer are privy to as adults. He carries this slightly off perspective through his adult characters as well, showing us a perspective we all know yet seem to forget.

His book Insomnia was published my junior year of high school, during that grey period where you simultaneously straddle the worlds of childhood and adulthood. One line from that book stayed in my mind for the entire year, most likely due to the sing-songy quality with which my internal voice read it.

Done bun can’t be undone.

I never really thought what that line meant until just recently. Literally, once the bread is baked, there is no going back to the dough.

How much effort do we waste in our lives trying to undo done buns? How often do we lament “the way things were” and we try to navigate back to them? How much time do we spend replaying past decisions and mentally taking new paths?

I find it interesting that the book was released the same year I began dating my now ex-husband. Those fateful words were spooling through my head during our courtship. Done bun can’t be undone.

Rather than fight against the past, I have learned to accept it. Would I do it over again the same way? It doesn’t matter. I don’t have that option. Instead, I try to take the past as a starting point.

A done bun can’t be undone, but it can be enjoyed with a pat of butter and a hot mug of tea.

On the Menu: Green Gingersnap Smoothie

Posted on by stilllearning2b

After receiving a Vitamix for my birthday, I had fun trying different smoothie recipes. This combination has turned out to be my favorite:) I love the combination of protein and carbs after a workout and the gingersnap flavor satisfies my sweet tooth!

Green Gingersnap Smoothie

If It’s Broke…

Posted on by stilllearning2b

I don’t know about your life, but in mine everything seems to break down at once. It’s as though everything in my surroundings has been woven into a complex Rube Goldberg machine and once one part breaks, the rest inevitably follow. This past week was one of those times when everything seemed to break around me. As I struggled to stay positive and centered in my busy schedule, I realized that all breaks are not the same and do not require the same approach.

Illustration of a garage door.

Adapt to It

The domino run started with the garage door. The motor burned out a couple of weeks ago. As we are currently in a rental, we had to wait for the landlord and are now waiting on an appointment with Home Depot to have the mechanism replaced. Considering that I don’t park in the garage (or even next to the garage, as that would require going downhill), you would think that this would not be a major inconvenience for me. You’d be wrong, however. No garage door means that I have to navigate the front door with my hands full of bags and beverages several times a day. The front door that has a sticky lock and a companion screen door whose jaws snap shut faster than my pit bull’s. Then, in the dark of the early morning, I have to navigate a poorly-laid stone pathway in my heels without spilling my coffee on my work clothes.

My first few times with this new routine were a disaster. Coffee was spilled or left on the front porch. The keys would somehow become glued in the lock and require archaic incantations to be released. The screen door snatched groceries out my hands and attempted to amputate my legs as I wrestled with my bulky gym bag. Over a few days, however, I learned how to prop the screen door open just so and I mastered the precise twist of the key that unlocks the door. I’ve developed a hopscotch dance around the loose stones on the path and I’ve even managed to get the coffee to the car without spilling.

I have adapted to the situation as it is. Its repair is out of my hands, so complaining about the current state of the garage door is worthless. The discomfort is temporary and I am now much more appreciative of how much a simple door makes it easier to come and go from the home. I’m still looking forward to Home Depot’s visit tomorrow, though!

Scanner

Work Around It

My classroom is pretty high-tech. I have a mounted projector and an interactive whiteboard that I use for instruction. This means that I need digital copies of documents and answer keys in order to show them to the class. As a math teacher in the era where physical textbooks are obsolete, this is something that I do several times a day. I have a desktop scanner in my room that is connected to one of the student computers. This scanner worked reasonably well last year, but was very slow and cumbersome. This year, it decided not to work at all.

For the first couple weeks of school, this was a major stressor for me. Something that should only take a few moments (the scanning of an answer key, for example) could take over an hour as I sought a functioning and available scanner. Not a good use of time.

The tech guy finally made it around to my room but he didn’t sound very hopeful about the chances of a full resurrection of my scanner. But he offered an alternative – an iPhone app called TurboScan that would allow me to take a photo of the page using my personal phone, convert it to a PDF, and email it to my work address all within a couple minutes. I no longer cared about the slumbering desktop scanner taking up space in my room. It became obsolete with the $1.99 purchase price of the app.

Sometimes a breakdown requires looking for a novel solution to a problem. It can be the push we need to move beyond the status quo and figure out a new way of doing something.

1994-2001 Acura Integra photographed in USA.

Fix It

I’ve written before about my car. Maybe I shouldn’t have, because as soon as I wrote that post, my car has demanded attention in the form of a new timing belt and water pump (planned), new brakes (unplanned), and a new power steering pump (unplanned). After that expensive summer, I thought I was home free for a while. Apparently my car did not receive the message. While on the interstate at 6:30 am on Tuesday, the temperature gauge sprinted to the right, burying itself in the red. A stressful situation for anyone, but especially so for a teacher at the beginning of the school year. Repair shops open after I am at work and close before I leave. I have no lunch break and cannot take time off without a sub. My boyfriend, who usually helps in situations like this, was out of town. Luckily, through the assistance of several people and a mad dash to a nearby shop, the issue was temporarily fixed (water added directly to the radiator), diagnosed (bad water pump – yup, the one that was just replaced), and will be repaired tomorrow with the help of the boyfriend (if you’re keeping track, that’s the same day as the new garage door).

In the midst of all of this, I began to bad-mouth my car, wondering if it was time to let her go. But then, I suddenly realized, that including the original purchase price and all of the repairs and maintenance over the life of the car, I have spent an average of $1,500 per year on the vehicle. Even if I spend several hundred dollars on her now, that ratio will probably only improve over the next 100,000 miles everyone says she’ll last. Sometimes it’s best just to fix what is broken and realize the value that is still inherent within.

Cover of "Sh*t My Dad Says"

Rest It

Break downs can happen apart from the objects in our lives.  By Friday, my body decided to join this great damaged party as it fell prey to the new pathogens arriving on the hands of the students. Instead of running 20 miles yesterday as prescribed by my marathon training program, I took 20 naps. Experience has taught me that these August bugs are viral, meaning there is no “fix,” as antibiotics are useless. Instead, the only prudent course is to rest.

I was able to alleviate some of the frustration over a “wasted” weekend when I learned that my library (finally!) has books available on Kindle. I never thought I would get used to ebooks, but I love the ease on my wrists (those heavy books hurt after a while), the lack of clutter around the house, and the built-in nightlight for reading in bed. Although the selection is still somewhat anemic, I was able to download and read three books yesterday (Sh*t My Dad Says, The Help, and Juliet Naked) without a trip to the library. Heaven for a sick bookworm.

On a side note, I have noticed that since I added green smoothies to my daily diet, my illnesses are greatly reduced in frequency and severity. Since receiving a Vitamix from my boyfriend as a recent birthday gift, I am now pretty much living on smoothies:) As long as the Vitamix doesn’t break…

Let It Go

I’ve talked before about Maddy, my cat. My ex and I got her in the early years of our relationship. She has been with me through everything and is now happier than ever with her new daddy and her pit bull snuggle-buddy.  Unfortunately, her age is beginning to show and she is demonstrating signs of kidney failure. This is a break that cannot be fixed. Her body is simply wearing out. At this time, she is still happy and hungry and does not appear to be in any discomfort. We are addressing her needs – more water and more absorbent litter – as we watch her for signs that it’s time to make a decision. This is the hardest kind of break of all. I cannot fix her. Only recognize when it is time to let go.
It is natural for things to break. We only become more stressed when we fight that reality. Accept the break and recognize what path is indicated in each situation. Use the breakdowns to highlight the blessings within your life and to find novel solutions. Just because it’s broke, does not mean it’s over.

photos from Wikipedia (door and car), Flickr (scanner), and Amazon (book cover)