Can You Pin Happiness?
I joined Pinterest a few months ago to see what all of the fuss was about and to share my quotes and book information. I spent a few hours over the next week exploring various topic streams and signing up to follow boards that I found interesting (fitness, vegetarian, inspirational quotes). I love Pinterest for inspiration and ideas (those pumpkin recipes floating around last month made me want to take a week off work to spend in the kitchen!). Despite the positive impact that pinning can have as a virtual muse and design board, I also see a dark side casting shadows on the perfect pictures.
Many pins have the effect of ramping up expectations, often to levels that are impossible without a trust fund, a gaggle of helpers, or rib-removal surgery. It’s so easy to get caught up in the beautiful pictures, one after another, and to let your mind fantasize. The images cement our daydreams, providing a goal that may be inspirational or may be utterly unattainable. There is a fine line between reading a quote layered over a fitness model and feeling encouraged to work out and feeling frustrated that no number of hours in the gym will be able to give you that physique.
Nowhere does this setting of expectations get more out of hand than on the wedding boards. These are some of the most popular pins, making the rounds among women of all age: married, single and in-between. There are photos of elaborate dresses with price tags to match. Pictures of cakes with carefully crafted fondant. Images of budget-friendly decoration ideas. But they all have one thing in common. They’re perfect.
I get it. It’s much easier to focus on a single day than the parade of days that create a marriage. We can try to convince ourselves that a picture perfect wedding will somehow trickle down into the years of the marriage. Sadly, the proper shade of aubergine (what color is that, anyway!?!) for the bridesmaid’s dresses will not mitigate that recurring argument about the dishes. I wonder what a real life marriage board would look like? Probably not so perfect π

I fear that too much time spent perusing perfect pictures will move a person away from happiness as the gap between their expectations and reality grows ever wider. Be a discerning consumer of media of all types. Filter what you are exposed to and limit yourself to images that inspire you and lift you up. Watch yourself and be prepared to go on a media diet if you find that you are becoming too engrossed in the pursuit of perfection. And for goodness sake, please get off the wedding boards:)
Pin it then live it. Don’t let your dreams only exist in the digital world.
Revelations in Raddichio
Yesterday morning, I received the following post on my Facebook page:
Would you be interested in going on a date with me? Say, dinner and a movie tonight? If so, could you please meet me at my place by 6:00 pm? Oh yeah, BTW I have a big dog that is really nice so don’t be scared when you see him. His name is Tiger (see pic below) and he is very sweet. Have a nice day and I hope to see you tonight.
Your friend, Brock
This request me giggling with glee and anticipation. It was so much better than the usual, “Hey, you wanna do dinner and movie tonight?” that we are both guilty of. So, of course, I accepted the date. I even showed up early:)
We decided to do dinner at a convenient little Mexicanish place down the street so that we could avoid the Friday post-work hell that is Atlanta traffic. We each got our usual: salad with beans and no dressing for me and salad with chicken and vinaigrette for him. Even though I’ve eaten hundreds of meals with this man, I noticed something last night for the first time.

The salad comes with the lettuce on the bottom of the bowl and then heaps of sour cream, guacamole, salsa, grilled veggies and, in his case, chicken, piled on top. Before Brock took a bite, he carefully blended the entire bowl, mixing the best parts in with the blander selections.
I looked down at my plate. I was doing my usual – eating the lettuce first and saving my favorite, the guacamole, until last. I also got to thinking about my ex.
Quick disclaimer here. I am not in the habit of comparing Brock and my ex. It is a pointless and potentially dangerous endeavor. However, sometimes aspects of Brock help to bring me more clarity about my ex.
My ex used to eat his favorite part of the meal first and then he would move on to the less palatable portions.
Revelation.
We eat like we approach life. Me? I tend to delay happiness and have no problem trudging through mediocrity to hopefully get there at some point. My ex? He had no problem going straight for what he wanted and had trouble delaying gratification. And Brock? I think he does it best, mixing satisfaction along with the necessities.
Now, Brock and I both tend to eat too quickly (I can thank being a teacher with 20 minute lunches for that one!). Maybe that’s a sign that we both need to slow down to savor life a bit more.
I know one thing. Next time I find myself eating a salad, I’m going to enjoy some guacamole with every bite.
P.S. Skyfall is Bond at its campy, fun, exciting best π





