There is a particular yoga sequence (crescent lunge into a bird of paradise) that used to vex me. I simply couldn’t get my body to twist and open to accomplish the pose. My first attempt was a bit of a disaster but it was also a learning experience.
Every time I enter the yoga studio, I encounter a pose or sequence that is beyond me. I used to tell myself, “I can’t do that” and, after a reasonable number of attempts, I would simply stop trying, thus proving myself right. What I have come to realize is that I need to tell myself, “I can’t do that right now.” That statement acknowledges the truth in the moment but also recognizes that it can change. “I can’t right now” leaves you free to try again and leaves your mind open to the possibilities.
Oh, and that sequence that used to stop me cold? I can now do it with ease. Of course, last Sunday, the instructor added a twisted bird of paradise. I can’t do that….yet.
The Moffett Company was founded “out of a desire to see businesses and their employees thriving, not simply surviving; passion is the centerpiece” of their message. Sean Moffett coaches his many stellar clients to not let fear make their decisions and how to create opportunity out of hardship. If you’re at all familiar with my writing, you know that those are familiar themes for me as well as I discuss how I used my tsunami divorce as a springboard for positive change.
I am honored to be an invited guest on Sean Moffett’s live, on-air broadcast on November 21 at 12:00 EST. You can view the show and participate in the live chat on The Moffett Message. Check it out and learn how you can choose to maximize your life!
Lisa Arends on The Moffett Message Wednesday, Nov. 21 at 12:00 EST
I joined Pinterest a few months ago to see what all of the fuss was about and to share my quotes and book information. I spent a few hours over the next week exploring various topic streams and signing up to follow boards that I found interesting (fitness, vegetarian, inspirational quotes). I love Pinterest for inspiration and ideas (those pumpkin recipes floating around last month made me want to take a week off work to spend in the kitchen!). Despite the positive impact that pinning can have as a virtual muse and design board, I also see a dark side casting shadows on the perfect pictures.
Many pins have the effect of ramping up expectations, often to levels that are impossible without a trust fund, a gaggle of helpers, or rib-removal surgery. It’s so easy to get caught up in the beautiful pictures, one after another, and to let your mind fantasize. The images cement our daydreams, providing a goal that may be inspirational or may be utterly unattainable. There is a fine line between reading a quote layered over a fitness model and feeling encouraged to work out and feeling frustrated that no number of hours in the gym will be able to give you that physique.
English: Fitness Model posing with dumbell. Photo by Glenn Francis of http://www.PacificProDigital.com (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
Nowhere does this setting of expectations get more out of hand than on the wedding boards. These are some of the most popular pins, making the rounds among women of all age: married, single and in-between. There are photos of elaborate dresses with price tags to match. Pictures of cakes with carefully crafted fondant. Images of budget-friendly decoration ideas. But they all have one thing in common. They’re perfect.
I get it. It’s much easier to focus on a single day than the parade of days that create a marriage. We can try to convince ourselves that a picture perfect wedding will somehow trickle down into the years of the marriage. Sadly, the proper shade of aubergine (what color is that, anyway!?!) for the bridesmaid’s dresses will not mitigate that recurring argument about the dishes. I wonder what a real life marriage board would look like? Probably not so perfect 🙂
Wedding Dress For Happy Couple in Love (Photo credit: epSos.de)
I fear that too much time spent perusing perfect pictures will move a person away from happiness as the gap between their expectations and reality grows ever wider. Be a discerning consumer of media of all types. Filter what you are exposed to and limit yourself to images that inspire you and lift you up. Watch yourself and be prepared to go on a media diet if you find that you are becoming too engrossed in the pursuit of perfection. And for goodness sake, please get off the wedding boards:)
Pin it then live it. Don’t let your dreams only exist in the digital world.
Lessons From the End of a Marriage 