Slowly Turning Up the Heat: The Dark Side of the “New Normal”

A "new normal" can simply be a period of adjustment, of accepting what has changed and adapting to a new environment. This type of acclimatization may be uncomfortable, but it is ultimately relatively harmless and potentially even provides opportunity for growth. Learn more about the "new normal" after divorce. But that's not always the case. … Continue reading Slowly Turning Up the Heat: The Dark Side of the “New Normal”

How NOT to Be a Victim (No Matter What Life Throws at You!)

“Let me introduce you to the victim advocate,” offered the policeman who had arrested my husband the day before.   I stopped short. That was the first time that word – victim – had ever been applied to me. I certainly felt victimized. My partner of sixteen years had just abandoned me with a text … Continue reading How NOT to Be a Victim (No Matter What Life Throws at You!)

Your Rights and Responsibilities in Marriage

Your Rights In a Marriage   1 - You have the right to be safe. You are entitled to be physically unharmed in your marriage. This right extends to the protection of all dimensions of abuse, from emotional to financial. You have the right to an expectation that your spouse does not seek to harm … Continue reading Your Rights and Responsibilities in Marriage

Finding Your Strength Through Your Victim Impact Statement

At the gym yesterday, there was a man near me who was using his headset to have a phone conversation. Hearing the one-sided discussion about inane business matters made me irrationally angry. I kept trying to tune him out, to let the music and other voices drown out his, but my attention kept being drawn … Continue reading Finding Your Strength Through Your Victim Impact Statement

Seven Strategies a Covert Abuser Uses to Create Convincing Lies

covert abuser

Unless you've been there, you simply cannot understand how well a covert abuser can lie. The stories are so cunningly crafted and so expertly delivered that even the professionals can be fooled. It's one of the harder - and more frustrating - parts of emerging from this type of relationship, as you feel like nobody … Continue reading Seven Strategies a Covert Abuser Uses to Create Convincing Lies