The 8 Loneliest Moments After Divorce (And How to Lessen Their Sting)

loneliest

There is no escaping the feeling of loneliness after divorce. After all, a shared life has been cleaved into two separate paths. The sense of isolation is a quiet companion for much of the┬átime, although some circumstances cause it to wake up wailing. Here's when you can expect the loneliness to be at its worst … Continue reading The 8 Loneliest Moments After Divorce (And How to Lessen Their Sting)

I Wonder

wonder

My ex had a birthday recently. His 39th. I wonder if he's still alive. At the end of it all, he seemed to be on a collision course with an early death. I wonder if any wrinkles or grey hairs have started to appear. I used to look forward to growing old with him. I … Continue reading I Wonder

Lonely in Love? How Long to Create a Shared History?

How long does it take to create a shared history? I think I finally have an answer. In many ways, losing the shared history that I had with my first husband was even harder than losing my first husband. Because a shared history is something distinctive. The best and most memorable moments coexisting in both … Continue reading Lonely in Love? How Long to Create a Shared History?

Ruminating vs. Processing. Do You Know the Difference?

I often find that people are confused about the difference between ruminating on the past and processing the past. They think they are doing one when, in reality, they are often doing more of the other. I can see where the confusion exists - both ruminating and processing involve thinking about (and perhaps talking about) … Continue reading Ruminating vs. Processing. Do You Know the Difference?

Are You a Reliable Witness?

When I was in 5th grade, I was in a gifted pull-out program. Two days a week, I got to miss my afternoon classes in order to tackle challenges and puzzles that were outside the state-mandated curriculum. One afternoon, we were all working hard at our tables on a set of brain teasers we had … Continue reading Are You a Reliable Witness?