Life at the Intersection of Divorced and Engaged

I currently live at the intersection of divorced and engaged. It’s a temporary home, one which I will only occupy for a little more than a year. I am never sure how to answer when people inquire about my relationship status. If I reply that I am divorced, they look at the ring on my finger with puzzlement. If I answer with, “Engaged,” I begin to receive advice appropriate to someone who has only had experience with singlehood. I am divorced and engaged, both states equally as true. My divorce has formed me into who I am and the engagement describes where I am going. But in this fleeting moment, I am described by both my past and my future.

Read the rest on The Huffington Post.

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15 thoughts on “Life at the Intersection of Divorced and Engaged

  1. Congratulations! As someone who has been divorced for about 18 months and has yet to date, it is reassuring to hear that you have found happiness and love in a new relationship. All the best to both of you!

  2. I read your piece on the Post. Very well written, and definitely brought a knowing smile to my face in some places, and a knowing grunt others. I think what struck me the most was that feeling — or understanding, I suppose — that came with getting married the second time. Like you, my first marriage came fluidly and with a sense and ease. To the point I don’t recall much about the process. It lasted 15 years, the last half of which are — to be kind — vague. I’ve been remarried for almost six years now, and I can remember every second of the night we first met. I can replay our wedding day it will, and still get happily choked up whenever I think of the first time I told her “I love you.” Here’s to real love, real life and real memories 😉

  3. You describe the ‘intersection’ so well. The challenge of self identity is a constant and you have mastered this well, neither divorced not engaged, simply yourself. .
    I am so happy for you in your new-found happiness with your partner.

  4. lovely– thanks for sharing. my own feelings about marriage at the moment are as of yet completely unfleshed out– although i am beginning to at least explore them– wrote a post about it yesterday. i admire your clarity and courage– and love hearing about your journey.

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