I became one with the trail today. Vibrams landing lightly on the packed earth, not scaring away the wildlife. Clear lake peaking out through the trees, providing psychic coolness in the unusual early spring heat. Ears bare, open to the sounds of the park. I love runs like these, the synergy of body, mind and environment in perfect harmony.
Some people like to run with friends. Others prefer to run with scissors (I’m looking at you, Augusten Burroughs). As for me, I prefer to run with zombies.
First, a quick note. I’ll be honest: I’m not sure which preposition to use here.
Running with zombies or
Running from zombies?
Nonetheless, I did run and there were (at least in a sense) zombies. I downloaded the Zombies, Run App on my iPhone the other day. This app is like a video game that you play by running. A story is told, a mission at a time, over and between the songs on your playlist. As you reach certain time and/or distance goals, you obtain items which help you in further missions. The best part, and the reason I tried the app, is that periodically the zombies will chase you, forcing you to pick up the pace and sprint.
A little disclaimer here. I’m usually really good about pushing myself, but I have a hard time doing much of a sprint in the middle of a run. I get in the groove and go. So, usually my excuse for speed work (with the exception of dedicated sprints) is pretty pitiful.
Yeah, the zombies changed that. Even when you are surrounded by families pushing strollers and walking adorable little puppies, something about the sounds of the undead behind you encourages you to run. Fast. I got more out of that run than I normally do with speed work.
Today was my first trial, and I now know I need to tweak my playlist before I use it again. I tend to run to a mix of heavy metal and Celtic music (look, we’ve already established I’m a little nuts; no need to rub it in). Well, the former, was a great soundtrack for the walking dead. Somehow it just seemed right to hear their moaning over Megadeth, Slayer, or Dead Horse. But the Celtic? Not so much. I kept picturing a pipe and drum band formed of zombies chasing me, their kilts a’flapping in the wind. Shudder. I think I might save the Scottish for the zombie-free runs.
Overall, it was a fun little experiment that made my run entertaining and pushed me a little harder. I think I’ll add zombies to my running repertoire. Once I rip those bagpipes from their undead hands, that is.
It’s time for another race.
I ran my first race, a half marathon, 3 months after he left. I signed up because I needed a challenge. I needed something tangible that I could overcome in a set amount of time. I needed to prove to myself that I had the strength, both mental and physical, to push through and endure. Training gave me a focus, a purpose. At that time, it served as motivation to eat so that I could gain enough weight to handle the distance. It kept me moving on days I wanted to stutter to a stop. The race gave me a reason regain my physical health and an outlet for my mental health; that first race both gave me a reason to get well and proof that I could endure.
Although I ran many more races, my next challenge was Tough Mudder the following year. The motivation this time was somewhat different. I saw this as an opportunity to overcome the adversity with a partner, my boyfriend of less than a year at that point. It was a test of trust, of bonding, of partnership. Sharing the experience and overcoming the obstacles together brought us closer. The physical demands also stepped up my game; the half marathon I ran 7 days later was a mere blip on the screen after what those crazy Mudders put me through.
It’s been a year and I haven’t faced another challenge. It’s time for another race.
I’ve signed up for a marathon this fall. My first. I’m doing this one alone, in contrast to the first two. This will be my longest distance by far; I have yet to run more than 15 miles in a stretch. But that’s not really the challenge. I’ve shied away from this ultimate run in the past because of the training requirements; they are quite daunting. My challenge this time and my motivation is to learn how to maintain balance in my life even when something is pulling at me like an impatient toddler. I want to complete the training without being consumed by the training. I need to prove to myself that I can tackle a challenge and continue to live in the process. So, here’s to 26.2!
I’m a little afraid of what next year might bring if I continue this pattern…
There are some days where I should have a great run: my legs are fresh, I’m rested, my breathing is clear, and the weather is perfect. Yet, on some of these days, each step is a supreme effort and my body, which was feeling powerful moments before, feels like a car with no power steering.
There are some days where I should have a tough run; my legs are fatigued, I’m tired, I’m wheezy or congested, and the weather is either freezing and windy or hot, humid and still. Yet, on some of these days, I fly through the run, aware of my body executing each step almost effortlessly.
The determining factor in the run is not the physical (rest, fatigue) nor the external (weather). The critical component is my mindset at the outset. If I begin with the thought that the run is something to get through or the fear that I may not make my distance and/or time goal for the day, I struggle with the effort. However, if I go into the run accepting the current state of things and just looking to explore what I am capable of, I often surprise myself with what I can accomplish.
Think about how you approach different challenges or even each day in your life. Are you “getting through” or “exploring what can be”? What is your mindset at the outset?
Lessons From the End of a Marriage 