How to Recover from a Broken Heart

This post on MindBodyGreen goes beyond the usual platitudes to give true insight into the healing process from the end of a relationship. Out of the tips provided, the one that took me the longest to realize was that, regardless of appearances, the pain of a break-up goes both ways. Once I was able to understand that he was in pain as well, I was able to take the first tentative steps towards forgiveness. For those of you still stinging from the pain, I hope that this post brings you some insight and some hope.

How to Recover from a Broken Heart.

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7 thoughts on “How to Recover from a Broken Heart

  1. I don’t agree. My experience leads me to believe that when a break up happens almost overnight and the person is narcistic and compulsive there is no remorse nor pain. Every situation is different. I do hope that one day, the father of my child does experience a sense of loss and recognize how he had chosen to handle this situation. If he had been truthful and honest, I would have gladly given him a divorce. In my shock, I remained dignified and respectful and granted him an immediate divorce in order to leave his country with my son. I hold no anger, feelings of revenge or hatred. Maybe a but of pity, because I have the wonderful opportunity to see my son mature and become a sensitive and caring young man, who I am so very proud of.

    1. I understand what you’re saying. I guess I don’t feel that my ex had the same pain from the break up, but he was in pain, nonetheless. His pain is buried deep; however, and I do not think he will allow it to surface enough to consciously feel guilt or remorse. The hurt is still there beneath the callous actions. Understanding that pain was behind his actions allowed me to move out of a victim place and begin the long process of healing.

      I am so glad to hear that your son is turning into an amazing man. He is lucky to have a mom like you πŸ™‚

  2. I don’t agree. My experience leads me to believe that when a break up happens almost overnight and the person is narcisitic and compulsive– there is no remorse nor pain. Every situation is different. I do hope that one day, the father of my child does experience a sense of loss and recognize how he had chosen to handle this situation. .

    In my shock, I remained dignified and respectful and granted him an immediate divorce (after 23 years of marriage) in order to leave his country with my son. I hold no anger, feelings of revenge or hatred. Maybe a bit of pity, because I have the wonderful opportunity to see my son mature and become a sensitive and caring young man, who I am very proud of and he is missing this once in a lifetime experience.

  3. I do agree and I see it in the angry responses, the refusal to cooperate on parenting issues, visitation and financial disclosure. I can’t tell him what to do, but now that I’ve started the divorce process, I know I’m moving forward and the more he fights out of pain and anger, the more he hurts himself and, ultimately, his children. I know I’m progressing though. It’s more difficult to accept that they are in pain when they’ve brought about the destruction of the marriage through infidelity or neglect. I do accept that he’s hurting, but I can’t let sympathy for that get the better of me and go back to caring for his emotional wellbeing at the cost of my own.

    Every situation is different and I’m sure there are those who move on without blinking. It’s a good article. πŸ™‚

    1. Well said. So often the anger and acting out is born of pain. It’s important to recognize but it is also important to keep your distance and take care of yourself and your kids first. I think you can have compassion for the suffering of another human being from a safe distance.

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