I Loved My Husband Last Night

Posted on by stilllearning2b
my husband

I loved my husband last night.

 

He rubbed my legs, sore and stiff from the demands of the end of the school year.

But that’s not why I loved him.

 

He took me out to dinner to get some gluten free pizza that I’ve been craving for weeks.

But that’s not why I loved him.

 

We had a great conversation about our hopes and dreams and plans for semi- and real retirement.

But that’s not why I loved him.

 

In fact, the reason I loved him had nothing to do with me at all.

 

The young waiter at the restaurant last night was having a rough time. Our salads never came out. My husband’s order was somehow replaced with a sub par facsimile. My husband expressed his displeasure when the waiter came around to check on the order. I could tell the young guy was flustered. He flipped to our order in his tablet to confirm he recorded the right dish. Based upon his utterances, I think he understood the order but wrote it in a way that was confusing to decipher. He walked off to handle the kitchen and put in the request for the right dish.

The manager came around and told us the replacement would be out soon. My husband indicated he really just wanted the salad which was ordered almost a half hour prior.

The waiter returned to tell us the new meal was on its way and asked if we needed anything. “Just our salads,” my husband said, “But I think your boss is getting them now.”

A look of pure shame and frustration fell over the waiter’s face, the final curtain after a poorly received act. As he walked towards the back, I saw his arms go up to his face as though they wanted to punish him and shield him at the same time.

I mentioned my observation to my husband, as he was facing the other way.

And what he did next is the reason I loved him.

When the correct order was finally placed in front of him (a grilled pizza slathered in peppers and mushrooms), he called the waiter over. The boy approached, hesitantly. “This is awesome!” my husband exclaimed, reaching out for a fist bump with the surprised waiter.

When the manager again came to check on us, my husband stated, “Tell our waiter he’s doing a really good job making sure that everything’s okay.”

And on the check, he added the words, ‘Thank you. Good job!” above the tip line.

 

I loved my husband last night not because of what he does for me or for our family but for what he did for a stranger who was having a rough night.

I loved my husband last night for making the effort to make someone smile and for bringing some good into someone’s day.

I loved my husband last night for his empathy and generosity.

I loved my husband last night for reaching out even when he had nothing to gain in return.

 

Maybe the way we treat waiters really does reveal our true selves.

 

 

Community

Posted on by stilllearning2b

Yesterday was my favorite day of the entire school year. We took over a thousand students, over a hundred teachers and staff and a couple hundred parents out into the community for a day of giving back. Classes were dispersed to children’s shelters, the Human Society and nursing homes. Students helped set up for Relay for Life and assisted food pantries with organizing and packaging their donations. My class was sent to a local park where they helped move logs that were causing trail erosion and dragged debris onto social trails to obliterate them so that hikers are directed to the primary trails. Back the school, we learned that we raised over $3,000 to donate to three different organizations and collected over $12,000 worth of food that is going to two local shelters.

It’s a beautiful day. Being 8th graders, they usually grumble about it before hand and refuse to admit the significance of the day after, but it is in their faces. I saw quiet students come to life on that trail, no longer worried about their appearance or cool factor as they drug branches and scattered leaves. I saw the pride in their faces as they turned back down the hill and witnessed the transformation they had created in the woods beneath. I saw them connect to the specialness of the place and the bond of working together to achieve a goal. I even saw tears on some of their faces as the donations were awarded to the selected organizations that afternoon.

It is a day that teaches them the importance of looking beyond themselves. Of giving back. Of being connected and belonging to a community.

Those are lessons that will hopefully persist well beyond the day.

The view from the top of the trail the students helped to maintain.
The view from the top of the trail the students helped to maintain.

This also happens to be the weekend that Brock’s martial arts instructor is in town to host a biannual seminar. As is tradition, we will celebrate tonight with the entire group at dinner: Brock’s teacher, Brock’s students and their families and even former group members. It is a diverse group yet we have become a community. Members support each other and look out for each other. It is a family where each person has a sense of belonging and contributing; they know they always have a home in the group. I am so proud of Brock and his effort to bring and keep the group together. It a beautiful thing.

I hope to develop my own community where those who have been through the end of a relationship can find understanding and support. A place that can help to alleviate some that crushing isolation in the early days and where those who have found their way can help those behind them.

This weekend, I celebrate community.

“I alone cannot change the world, but I can cast a stone across the waters to create many ripples.”
― Mother Teresa