21 Ways to Boost Your Confidence After Divorce

17 Responses

  1. jlgedeon says:

    Excellent advice 🙂

  2. secretangel says:

    Amen!! I Love this and totally agree with you. Divorce is not easy, especially if you are the “innocent” part of the equation! This is great advice…And number 7– can eventually lead to your own book to share with others. I never thought my struggles would one day be read by others.

  3. I think everything listed is an excellent way to take your mind off being divorced, but what happened to understanding that you are divorced? Talking to people that have gone through divorces, interacting with people that are single and looking to get back on track, strengthen your grasp on what went wrong in your relationship and how could you grow in your next one? All the things you recommend will build character but I believe the greatest thing in life is spending years leading to death with someone whom took care of your heart before it stops. So though this list is great, i would recommend finding yourself again so you can give yourself again. Go after Love again because you deserve a happy ending!!!!

    • All very important (and ideas I’ve written extensively about). Getting into what happened, understanding your role and being able to love again certainly build confidence. It just takes time (often years). This post is intended to give people ideas on how they can boost their confidence even while the healing and rebuilding is going on. Thanks!

    • Joy says:

      You’re so right but its close to impossible. Divorced for 7 but no one seem to be interested in me. Why?
      But the advice should uplift me.

  4. Ray says:

    Common theme here: Go out and LIVE! Go EXPERIENCE life! Amen! 🙂

  5. Matt says:

    Just kept nodding. Always on point, Lisa. Hope you’re having a joyful holiday season thus far.

  6. Swagger?–OMG! And 5 pull-ups? or maybe you don’t mean all at once…. I guess it doesn’t always take divorce to make one feel as you have described, but I’m sure divorce is a biggie! You are a good therapist, StillLearning2!

  7. Wendy says:

    Lisa, I love your insight! You have learned alot from your trials and I love that you are so willing to share your knowledge with others, thanks!

    I’m sorry but I need to jump in here with 1 of your suggestions. While flirting can boost your confidence, please be respectful of married men and women and keep the interaction respectful. I am shocked at the way some women act with my husband…even when I am around. It’s nice to have fun with the opposite sex but please be mindful when they are married or in a serious relationship. Your fun should not be at the expense of anyone else…and for those of us that have been cheated on, we deserve some respect. There’s having fun and crossing lines when it comes to flirting. (Sorry, I can be a little uptight at times, but I get tired of some people not knowing what boundaries are, and not so innocent flirting can lead to so much more.) So have fun, but please be respectful! 😉

    • Yes!!! Great addition. My brain doesn’t even go to the thought of flirting with married people. Hands off!

      • Flirting is fine, but if I had it to do over again, I’d be more careful. I had no idea how vulnerable I was, even after the divorce was final. My self-esteem was so low, I got stuck in a very unhealthy relationship. It only lasted a year, but it was a year too long. I wish I’d spent more time clarifying my boundaries, but hey, I learned to have more compassion for people who get stuck in unhealthy relationships.

  8. Wonderful advice! Last week was my first anniversary of ‘alone’, I didn’t realize it was bothering me, really bothering me until I sat with a friend yesterday who pointed out I had been withdrawn all week. I needed to really think about my reactions, my ‘celebration’ of this anniversary.

  9. Liv says:

    This is an awesome list!!

  10. Excellent Post! Very positive! I did most of these in recovering from my divorce arouned 2001, and they all helped. One other thing I did was to make a collage of the constants in my life, the things that gave me strength and were always there for me. I’ll be blogging about collages soon. For now, I’d like to re-blog this on “Loving Me, Too.” Thanks!

  11. Reblogged this on Loving Me, Too and commented:
    Excellent post for those recovering from a break up, or anyone wanting to build confidence!

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