Guest Post – Do I Have to Pay Child Support For My Adult Children?

Are you still wondering about how long you will have to pay child support? You might think that you don’t have to pay support after a child’s 18th birthday. However, the truth may not be so cut and dry.

There is a lot of misinformation out there on this topic, and a lot of people assuming the wrong thing. So today, the team at Fine & Associates are here to shed some light on paying child support for adult children in Ontario.

When Your Child Is Still in School

The Ontario Family Law Act states that “every parent has an obligation to provide support for his or her unmarried child who is a minor or is enrolled in a full time program of education, to the extent that the parent is capable of doing so.”

This piece of legislation stipulates that an unmarried child who is a minor or who is enrolled in a full time program of education is eligible for support only if he or she hasn’t voluntarily withdrawn from parental control, meaning that he or she has moved out and is living on his or her own.

When Your Child Is Ill or Disabled

The federal Divorce Act stipulates that a parent must provide support for their child who “is the age of majority or over and under their charge but unable, by reason of illness, disability or other cause, to withdraw from their charge or to obtain the necessities of life.”

That illness or disability might not be physical. In the case of Greenberg v. Greenberg, the judge found that the couple’s 19 year old daughter did not have the maturity or emotional stability to be able to withdraw from parental control. She was not going to be able to finish high school without financial support. The judge ordered support payments to continue as the young woman finished high school and worked part-time.

Other Situations

The federal Divorce Act is broader than Ontario’s Family Law Act. Therefore, there is a wider range of situations under which a parent would be ordered to pay an adult child’s support.

In the case of Willock v. Willock, a judge ordered a young woman’s parents to continue paying support as she trained to become a competitive cyclist. The judge reasoned that even if this young woman didn’t succeed as a competitive cyclist, her training would enable her to pursue “economic independence” as a cycling instructor.

Not a Straightforward Answer

As you can see, there are too many factors involved to give you a finite yes or no answer.

If you feel like you shouldn’t be paying child support any more, it’s always best to speak to a divorce lawyer. We recommend talking to lawyer before you speak to your ex spouse about any new child support arrangements.

This can take a lot of emotion out of the conversation, while arming you with legal facts- not just your opinion.

 

Author Bio:

Fine & Associates Professional Corporation is a well-respected Toronto law firm that prides itself on providing quality, personal service at reasonable rates. The firm’s lawyers practice divorce and family law exclusively, and are experienced in all types of cases, including but not limited to child support, child custody, and divorce mediation.

 

When Will My Divorce Be Over?

When will my divorce be over?

It seems like such a clear-cut question, doesn’t it? Obviously, the divorce is over when the legal process is finalized and you receive a decree embossed with your local court’s seal.

But that’s only a piece of the puzzle; that’s when the state sees you as divorced. Not necessarily when you do.

Because a divorce, like a marriage, is so much more than a piece of paper.

There are certain benchmarks that you have to meet before you can relax and truly see your divorce as over. These are in no particular order because they may occur at a different point for each person. And the timeline for healing will be different for everyone.

Release of Hope

Before you can view your divorce as final, you have to first accept that your marriage is over. Maybe you’re a fixer and you are still desperately trying to patch things together. Maybe you are still in disbelief and you keep hoping that your soon-to-be-ex will change his or her mind. Or maybe you have weathered many ups and downs over the course of your marriage and you are holding on to the idea that this down will again be followed by an up. It makes sense to hold on to hope as long as possible. After all, you don’t want to discard a marriage that is still salvageable. However, it’s also important to accept that you cannot control your partner’s choices and you cannot save a marriage on your own.

Acceptance of Circumstances

Divorce changes every aspect of your life – from living situation to lifestyle. Maybe you lost money in the deal or were ordered to pay alimony. Or the judge ordered joint custody when you were hoping for full. Perhaps you were made to move out of the marital home and your suburban spread has been replaced with a run down apartment. You may feel like your current situation is not fair, that you are being made to pay for situations beyond your control. And you may be right. Divorce isn’t about fair. It’s about getting through and moving forward. And that begins with accepting where you are.

Completion of Legal Matters

Divorce may be more than a piece of paper, but the acquisition of that paper sure can be a drawn-out and expensive process. And it’s difficult (if not impossible) to feel like the divorce is over while you’re still producing documents and cutting checks to lawyers. I have such empathy for those involved (either by circumstance or state law) in a year+ process (although I didn’t always feel that way). It’s difficult living in that limbo of separation where you’re neither married nor divorced.

Construction of Framework for New Life

It’s difficult to feel a sense of completion when the old chapter may be finished but the next is still a dark void. It’s much easier to feel like the divorce is fully behind you when you have at least the basics for the next steps in your life sketched out. You don’t have to know everything about the life you want to create post-divorce as much will unfold over time, but aim for some insight. Put the energy into laying out the framework for your new life; scaffolding makes moving forward more manageable.

Tempering of Bitterness

Are you still holding on to anger towards your ex or carrying a sense of derision for relationships in general? Even if you aren’t ready to date again (or even ever want to date again), this negativity makes it difficult to put the divorce behind you. Sometimes the residual acrid emotions are our attempt to avoid facing the sadness and loss hidden beneath. Other times, the anger is our shield because we are afraid of being seen as vulnerable and weak. Much of the time anger is simply pain screaming to be heard. So listen and answer.

Easing of Fear

Much like anger, fear can serve as a tether, holding you to your divorce. It’s scary facing the world alone when you’re used to having your spouse by your side. It’s terrifying to start over when you don’t even trust that you can stand. It’s daunting to think about dating again and starting a new relationship from scratch. And it may be even scarier to imagine being alone forever. The only way to lessen fear is to face it. Once you conquer those first few “I can’ts,” you’re confidence will build until you know you can.

Restoration of Balance

There is nothing balanced about life while you’re going through a divorce. Your emotions are running the show and are frequently as well behaved as a toddler on a sugar crash. You may be eating too much or too little or just too much of the wrong stuff. Perhaps you’ve become adept at avoiding reality through alcohol or distractions. Part of regaining your life after divorce is establishing healthy habits and a balanced environment. Re-evaluate what occupies your life and remove what no longer serves you.

Ultimately, your divorce is over when you see it as something that is a part of your story, your past. It no longer defines you or limits you. It speaks of where you’ve been, not where you are going. It’s an ending, yes. But one that allows a new beginning.

Related: Happiness is Divorce in the Rearview Mirror