Renovation

I’ve witnessed an uptick in home renovations over the past several weeks. Home Depot is busier than ever, dumpsters fill area driveways and signs advertising handymen are planted amongst the flowers in many of the yards. As I walk and run the neighborhood streets, I keep track of these remodeling jobs. I take note of what is changing, from landscaping to paint to flooring to whole new kitchens. I celebrate when the signs of work dissipate and I envision the family enjoying their new or refurbished spaces.

But all too often, those signs of remodeling are followed quickly by a “For Sale” sign, the upgrades completed only to say good-bye. I get the freshening up of a new coat of paint before putting a house on the market. I understand that it’s easier to lay new flooring when the current furnishings are already disassembled and in boxes. But some of these remodels speak of dreams long held by the owners – additions that improve the house, adding decks or patios to enjoy the outdoors or updating a kitchen or bath that was dated when the house was purchased.

And that makes me sad. The thought of those improvements being put off until it is too late. The thought of the family settling over time and allowing the dreams for the space to fade. The thought that they didn’t make creating the best home for them a priority while they there.

Perhaps it makes me sad because it parallels what I so often see in marriages. The diet and exercise programs only undertaken after the papers are signed. The commitment to becoming more patient or more compassionate only embraced after the marriage is dissolved. Or, in my own case, the tendency to work too much only mitigated after the end of the marriage.

Just like you adapt to your surroundings in a home, you adapt to your marriage over time. You may have great goals and intentions for yourself and your life, but then they fade into the backdrop of daily noise. And so you let it go.

Until it’s time to put yourself back on the market. And then out come the remodeling tools.

But you don’t have to wait to create the change you want. Dream it. Then do it.

But you don’t have to wait to add that deck until you’re placing your house on the market. And you don’t have to wait to better yourself until you’re back on the market. Making the changes earlier only increases the return on your investment. Even if you do have to move.

Remodeling

My grocery store of choice is currently being remodeled. They ran the numbers and decided that it made more financial sense to remain open during the construction and perform the construction at night when the store is closed. Of course, this also makes for a much more protracted process. Every evening, the closing employees have to drag shelves out of the way and move some of the product to a holding location. Then, every morning, the early crew moves the shelving back and restocks the product.

I’m friendly with many of the morning employees there (that happens when you go grocery shopping while other people are still sleeping!) and they are tiring of the project. They’re frustrated at making progress only to have it wiped out again the next night. They feel stuck. Motionless yet always moving.

I’m frustrated too. Even though I spend less than an hour a week there, I don’t like the experience at the moment. Nothing is in the same place from week to week. The aisles shrink and grow, breathing like a huge set of bellows. The produce bins seem to be playing musical chairs and their contents are bruised from additional handling. Even the atmosphere isn’t as nice. It’s generally a very well-kept store with good lighting and nice floors. But now? It feels dark and dingy, the floors a calico pelt of stain.

 

But, like all transitions, it’s temporary.

Change always requires some discomfort.

To make things better, you often have to strip them down.

Change can be unsightly. Ugly even.

Remodeling makes us face our assumptions and expectations.

It breaks habits. And that can be painful.

 

Progression is rarely linear; there are usually steps backwards as well as forward.

Change is frustrating. It’s hard to accept being neither here nor there.

 

But without remodeling, the knowledge born of experience could never be used to build a better future.

Without remodeling, nothing adapts to meet changing needs and demands.

And without remodeling, everything stagnates after a time.

Not just grocery stores.