“How do I get over being cheated on?”
This phrase makes its way into my messages several times a week.
And no matter how many times I read it, my stomach still clenches at those words.
Because I can remember the desperation that I had for that answer. It was part fear – “Can I EVER move past this?” and part plea for help – “HOW in the world can I get through this gutting pain?”
Required Readings: The Aftermath of Infidelity
Here’s what I wish I could go back and tell myself in those first, awful months after the discovery of betrayal:
Your blogs and videos are so helpful to me on this journey. The “Aftermath of infidelity” was particularly great. Thank you for giving me hope after her betrayal of a 32 year marriage.
I’m glad they help. Sorry you’re in need of them.
Thank you for sharing. My biggest thing now is how do I trust that the next person won’t cheat on me. Scars run deep.
They sure do. And it’s one challenge after another for awhile. As you know, there are no guarantees that someone won’t cheat. But now you know what to look for and I’ll bet you’ll choose better the next time!
Also, you now know that you CAN handle things on your own. You trust yourself. That’s HUGE!
Yep, you are right. I just have no idea how long it will take me before I am ready to put myself back out there. Ya know?
Totally know! I started dating my now-husband pretty quickly, but trust and vulnerability took a long time to appear.
Do you think it would have been easier if you waited longer?
In some ways, yes. Especially in regards to the physical signs of trauma I still held and the anger that was still very strong. We took it slowly and my husband was patient. At some point, I believe there’s some healing that can only occur within the context of an emotionally intimate relationship.
I think you are spot on. Scary stuff!
And also exciting. Possibilities and a chance to apply what you’re learning.
Thank you for your candid replies 🙂 Must. remember. there are STILL good eggs out there.
There are. And I hope you find one when you’re ready!
Thank you 🙂 I am so glad you found yours!
Thanks, you hit this right in the nail.