“But yesterday was so normal,” the brain kicks up in response to the news.
Turning away from the harsh reality of today.
The chest feels heavy, each breath straining against the bindings of grief. The gut is hollowed. Your body a brittle shell with the fleshy insides scooped out. You feel muted. Distant. A mere imitation of the person you were just yesterday.
The brain dances around the truth like a butterfly in the breeze, landing on the facts for only a moment before taking flight again.
Providing logical arguments that the reality is not real and when it seems inevitably so, offering bargains to alter its course. Because there must be some way to change these unbearable facts.
The whole terrible truth is massive and impossible to fathom, so the brain instead fixates on the inconsequential details. Looking for purpose and seeking a sense of control in a world gone mad.
There are those moments when you forget and a sight, a sound, a smell leads to an impossible expectation. That when dashed, makes the viscera plummet all over again.
Images are seared into your mind, branding you with the sweet pain of burned memory. Replaying like a track on repeat, only the song is a reminder of what you have lost.
The details of daily life, so important yesterday, have faded into obscurity. Have become meaningless. Because in the agony of today, nothing else matters.
Sometimes, we can choose to view the silver linings. And sometimes, there is no sense, no gain and no value to be found.
And in those moments when life is just hard, all we can do is reach out to those around us, be grateful for what we’ve had and learn how to move forward through the pain.
Trusting that hard will become easier in time.