Procrastination of Happiness

My Happiness (Powderfinger song)
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I’ve never been one to put things off.  Even as a kid, I would do all of my weekend homework as soon as I got home from school on Friday so that I didn’t have it hanging over my head. Just a few months ago, we had to move suddenly and around the holidays.  I had all of the boxes unpacked and broken down in 24 hours.   I coined the term, “reverse procrastinator” to describe myself; I would get things done quickly and under pressure, but I would accomplish them at the beginning of the timeframe, rather than against the actual deadline.

I’ve never been one to put things off.  Apart from my own happiness, that is.

I used to have a tendency to tackle my endless lists, take care of those around me, and say that I would take care of myself tomorrow.  Or during the coming weekend.  Or maybe on the next school break.  The trouble was that something else would always come up and take precedence.  I didn’t see this as a big problem.  I was happy enough, content.  I thought that if I focused on my husband’s well-being, that would take care of the marriage.  Besides, it felt selfish to focus on myself.

But putting off my own happiness didn’t save my marriage.  It didn’t make my husband any happier.  All it did was allow a few more crossed off items on the to-do list than I may have been able to accomplish otherwise.

I see things differently now.  By taking time to take care of myself, I am a better teacher, a better partner, a better me.  I still reverse procrastinate, but now I make sure that my happiness is also on the list of things to accomplish.


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