Ten Embarrassing Truths

I’ve spent the morning writing about some pretty heavy stuff and I just learned some very upsetting news about a friend. I’m ready to lighten the mood a bit. So, now for something completely different:

Ten Embarrassing Truths Revealed (Many for the very first time)

1) I am absolutely terrible about getting haircuts. I just had my first one since September. I don’t know why I’m so bad about them. I always intend to be better, but…

2) I can barely ride a bike (discussed in Learning to Go Downhill). It’s shameful since my dad is an uber bike rider and I’m so athletic.

3) Sometimes at night I pig out on a concoction of Greek yogurt, peanut butter, Splenda brown sugar and chocolate chips. In large quantities.

4) I wear this pair of sweatpants all the time around the house. They’re way too big and don’t even stay up. Even plumbers would be embarrassed.

5) My sneeze sounds like a barking chihuahua, in volume, sound and duration. All heads turn when my sinuses let go.

6) I gave up on cleaning my car about 6 years ago. In all other areas of my life, I am neat and clean. My car, however, is covered with black stuff on the outside and dog hair on the inside. Luckily, Tiger is my primary passenger.

7) Since I received my Kindle, I’ve started reading trashy novels. I pretend that it’s only because I can get them for free through Amazon or the library, but that’s just a rationalization.

8) I only learned how to pronounce “caprese” a couple months ago and I order caprese salads all the time.

9) I’m never sure how to spell “restaurant.”

10) I only know the names of a handful of my “gym buddies.” I’m bad about not paying attention to their names when we meet and then becoming friends with them later.

Okay, so there’s my embarrassing laundry for all to see:)  Anyone else willing to share theirs?

Thank you for sharing!

33 thoughts on “Ten Embarrassing Truths

  1. The Persecution of Mildred Dunlap – The year 1895 was filled with memorable historical events: the Dreyfus Affair divided France; Booker T. Washington gave his Atlanta address; Richard Olney, United States Secretary of State, expanded the effects of the Monroe Doctrine in settling a boundary dispute between the United Kingdom and Venezuela; and Oscar Wilde was tried and convicted for "gross indecency" under Britian's recently passed law that made sex between males a criminal offense. When the news of Wilde's conviction went out over telegraphs worldwide, it threw a small Nevada town into chaos. This is the story of what happened when the lives of its citizens were impacted by the news of Oscar Wildes' imprisonment. It is chronicle of hatred and prejudice with all its unintended and devastating consequences, and how love and friendship bring strength and healing. Paulette Mahurin, the author, is a Nurse Practitioner who lives in Ojai, California with her husband Terry and their two dogs--- Max and Bella. She practices women's health in a rural clinic and writes in her spare time. All profits from her book are going to animal rescue, Santa Paula Animal Shelter, the first and only no-kill shelter in Ventura County, CA, where she lives. (see links below on Ventura County Star Article & Shelter) To find out more please go the The Persecution of Mildred Dunlap on facebook or Amazon or e-mail us at the gavatar addresses. Thank you. (photos: of Paulette, her family, and a reading at The Ojai Art Center, July 2012)
    The Persecution of Mildred Dunlap says:

    It’s time for me to pop in and give you another big cyber hug. Hope your friend’s okay. Another big cyber hug, honey bunny. Paulette

    1. Thanks:) Unfortunately, the friend won’t be okay. We’re all just trying to come to terms with it. It’s definitely a reminder to embrace every moment because you never know how many you’ll have.

      1. The Persecution of Mildred Dunlap – The year 1895 was filled with memorable historical events: the Dreyfus Affair divided France; Booker T. Washington gave his Atlanta address; Richard Olney, United States Secretary of State, expanded the effects of the Monroe Doctrine in settling a boundary dispute between the United Kingdom and Venezuela; and Oscar Wilde was tried and convicted for "gross indecency" under Britian's recently passed law that made sex between males a criminal offense. When the news of Wilde's conviction went out over telegraphs worldwide, it threw a small Nevada town into chaos. This is the story of what happened when the lives of its citizens were impacted by the news of Oscar Wildes' imprisonment. It is chronicle of hatred and prejudice with all its unintended and devastating consequences, and how love and friendship bring strength and healing. Paulette Mahurin, the author, is a Nurse Practitioner who lives in Ojai, California with her husband Terry and their two dogs--- Max and Bella. She practices women's health in a rural clinic and writes in her spare time. All profits from her book are going to animal rescue, Santa Paula Animal Shelter, the first and only no-kill shelter in Ventura County, CA, where she lives. (see links below on Ventura County Star Article & Shelter) To find out more please go the The Persecution of Mildred Dunlap on facebook or Amazon or e-mail us at the gavatar addresses. Thank you. (photos: of Paulette, her family, and a reading at The Ojai Art Center, July 2012)
        The Persecution of Mildred Dunlap says:

        So sorry, honey. It’s never easy. But, yes this living breathing alive moment, is it. Love you, P

  2. I own Air Supply’s Greatest Hits CD and can sing along with all the songs… Whew! There. Got THAT out of the way! 🙂

    1. That’s a good one? Is there video or audio evidence?

      That reminds me of the video that was made one year of me teaching my 8th grade students how to square dance during bus call. Yup, I’m still a Texas gal at heart!

      1. Thankfully I only post song videos on my blog that I have written and sang…. Whew! Close one. Ya gotta love the harmonies of Air Supply, right?…. LOL…

        Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to laminate my MAN-CARD.

    2. soulfoodwords – Somewhere, Florida – I love creating things, especially the written word and food. I love learning new things by mistake and through trial & error. I feel deeply and love much.
      soulfoodwords says:

      Too funny! 😀

  3. soulfoodwords – Somewhere, Florida – I love creating things, especially the written word and food. I love learning new things by mistake and through trial & error. I feel deeply and love much.
    soulfoodwords says:

    1. I am an extremist. My haircut dilemma is like yours in that I grow it out for several years, not maintained by a visit to the hairdresser, only to want to shave it off. This is a good example, however it applies to other areas in my life as well; all or nothing, not much in between.
    2. Writing sometimes feels like having a bout of constipation. Good god, why is that so?
    3. I like dancing in the rain. I don’t do it often enough though.
    4. I thought foodie concoctions were my forte’ ! Braised cabbage in cream and lemon juice with cracked black pepper is not my concoction, but one I have adopted as a comfort food.
    5. I was given a brand new bike and because I wasn’t given a bicycle tire pump, it has become a place to hang my recycling bag before I take it to the bin outside.
    6. I exercise in 2months:2 years ratio. That is I am damn good about exercising for two months, buy a new pair of running shoes for my efforts, then don’t exercise at all for two years. Embarrassing!
    7. I am a die hard optimist who suffers from an undercurrent of depression.
    8. I don’t watch TV at all, but have a TV and my only couch faces it. I find this façade very funny!
    9. I like mint flavor in nearly all forms, but won’t touch mint chocolate chip icecream! Eeekkk!
    10. I am pretty flexible in that I can do some things like a contortionist, yet I have never figured out how to do a somersault.

    1. Love it! I can do somersaults but I’m so inflexible that I can only touch my toes after an hour long yoga class. Maybe there’s a correlation between these two things:)

      1. soulfoodwords – Somewhere, Florida – I love creating things, especially the written word and food. I love learning new things by mistake and through trial & error. I feel deeply and love much.
        soulfoodwords says:

        😀

    2. JoAnna – On the East Coast of the USA – An open minded, tree-hugging Jesus follower, former counselor, and life-long lover of animals, I'm returning to my creative roots and have published my first book: Trust the Timing, A Memoir of Finding Love Again as well as the short version: From Loneliness to Love.
      JoAnna says:

      I relate to #7. Being optimistic can be hard.

  4. candidkay – Experienced journalist, marketing exec and mother of two, I write about life as I know it. Sometimes happy, sometimes sad, sometimes hilarious. But always interesting.
    candidkay says:

    Re: #s 4 and 6. Two reasons I was thinking last night I’m not sure I’m ready to begin dating! Have to keep car clean, keep myself shaven and looking cute . . . feeling a bit lazy and not sure if worth it:)

  5. Oh man, I’m with you on the spelling of restaurant (you won’t believe it but I didn’t even spell it right then). Thank got for spell check!

    Thanks for sharing 🙂

    Rohan.

      1. Eater is good, diner works for me too. Now we just need a replacement for neighbourhood, that one always gets me for some reason as well!

        Rohan.

        1. That is a tough one too! I also would have to add “separate” to the list. I always want to replace an “a” with an “e.”

          It’s a good think I teach math!

  6. I can’t spell “necessary” for the life of me (without my friend the spell check).

  7. I am sorry to hear about your friend, and I related to your use of humor to lighten the mood. There’s a definite place for it in the midst of grief, and I hope that you find it to be healing. Thanks for giving me a bit of a laugh, and I share a few things on your list.

  8. I just stumbled onto your blog and feel like I’m reading my own story. It is helpful for me to see that you are having a happy ending….congrats on your nuptials.
    My dog is also named Tiger and I too can’t spell resturarnt. I love haircuts but that is because my girlfriend is my hair stylist. I am just a month shy of three years since my Hex told me he wanted a divorce and I said “Fine, I’m out”. I moved out three weeks later and into an apartment a week after that. My motto is keep moving forward. And I try. It’s up and down but always forward.

    Keep on keeping on!
    Cindy

  9. livebysurprise – Liv is the pseudonym reformed divorcee and single mom - now married, coparenting and working mother of three. She's been featured on ScaryMommy, HuffPost Divorce, The Mid and DivorcedMoms.com. More at http://www.livebysurprise.com.
    Liv says:

    I’m so about number 10. I made a sincere effort when we moved in three years ago to get the names of all the parents on the block with kids my kids age…and then the buggers all moved out. I couldn’t tell you who the new neighbours are. The guy with the Lexus, the English guy, the lady with the glasses and her mom. That’s who they are now.

  10. 1) I suffer select OCD. I park in the same parking spot every day at home and work (and have a bad day if someone else is in my parking spot). I grab exactly three napkins out of any napkin dispenser. I’m weird.

    2) I watch way too much television. Obsessed with the comic-book shows.

    3) Speaking of comic-books, I have about 10,000 total and I’ve read a majority of them.

    4) I am obsessed about my haircut (probably from my time in the Marine Corps). I cannot stand having long hair. I would get a haircut every single week if I had the time or the money (right now it’s about every two weeks).

    5) I now love sushi after getting over my fear of trying new things (thanks to my girlfriend).

    6) I drink way too much coffee but secretly hate how it stains my teeth.

    7) I oil my beard every single morning. More OCD I guess.

    8) I sneeze very loud. My son used to make fun of me when I sneezed. “Dude, Why do you have to sneeze so damn loud?” he used to say. He started saying that when he was about 6 years old! Even with the “damn”. I couldn’t reprimand him because he was so funny. Seriously, it’s like a cartoon it’s so loud.

    9) I am a very deep sleeper. I could probably sleep on an actual rock every night and still sleep soundly. I’ve actually done that in the Marine Corps.

    10) I never remember any of my dreams (or nightmares…which may be a good thing). I wake in the morning with a “blank” slate. My time asleep is totally empty to me like it never happened.

    Look at that. 10! I didn’t think I would have that many.

  11. JoAnna – On the East Coast of the USA – An open minded, tree-hugging Jesus follower, former counselor, and life-long lover of animals, I'm returning to my creative roots and have published my first book: Trust the Timing, A Memoir of Finding Love Again as well as the short version: From Loneliness to Love.
    JoAnna says:

    1. I have so much dog hair on my couch that I generally put a sheet or blanket over it when I want to sit on it. Though sometimes i vacuum when someone new is coming over.
    2. I love to wear my comfortable, raggedy clothes at home.
    3. I check the stove at least twice before I leave the house and say “off” as I look at each knob.
    4. I’ve never used an ATM or an automatic dishwasher. And I still write and mail checks to pay most of my bills.
    5. I really do hug trees. But I’m not embarrassed about that. They like to be hugged, and it makes up for using the paper checks.

  12. JoAnna – On the East Coast of the USA – An open minded, tree-hugging Jesus follower, former counselor, and life-long lover of animals, I'm returning to my creative roots and have published my first book: Trust the Timing, A Memoir of Finding Love Again as well as the short version: From Loneliness to Love.
    JoAnna says:

    Thank you. I have to admit, I”ve helped load someone else’s diswasher, and someone used an ATM for me once. 🙂

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