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After the Affair: When Does the Pain End?

11 Responses

  1. bookaddict04 says:

    Your words perfectly echo everything I have thought and felt in my own experience. Would you mind if I share this?

  2. It ends years later, but it does end. Then one day you say…. wow I am glad that is over and you barely even remember it – make that a celebration day….

  3. RosieJoseph says:

    Made me smile, in that we wait for the finish line. As you say there is no ‘finish line’ it is one of the threads that weave your cloth of life. ❤️

  4. CJ says:

    Four years after my wife’s 2-year emotional affair was exposed, and I still have that stain of pain just sitting there. It pops up off and on, especially when I am having trouble communicating with my wife (which seems like it happens more than I’d like, especially since she has still remained disconnected spiritually, emotionally and physically).

    It’s very hard to deal with daily triggers and even suspicion now and again when she works late. It’s that agonizing pain of what could have been — a marriage that wasn’t perfect by any stretch of the mean on either side (I know I’m not perfect either), but a marriage that wasn’t bad and had more good moments than down moments.

    But now that is all in the past and these 7-plus years of disconnect continues to haunt me daily. Just had our 25th wedding anniversary in June. Haven’t celebrated an anniversary in I don’t know how long. Just another year — another notch on the belt — to say we are legally together.

    And the pain just dwell there, like a guest that has overstayed their welcome for years and years but you can’t find a way to kick them out.

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