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Planning On Being a Stay At Home Parent? Make Sure You Consider THIS First!

16 Responses

  1. streetpoet12 says:

    Totally totally agree. If I had a time machine, I would totally go back

  2. Every woman should pay herself first even if it is only $10 a week. After 10 years that is $5200 not a lot but at least it is something.

  3. I agree. I kept my UK credit card. Boy, am I glad I did!

  4. JC says:

    This is spot-on. I will never regret staying home with my children…that was time with them that was priceless. But I do wish I had pursued my education more when I was younger or at least gotten a degree in a field that would still be relevant down the road after years of unemployment. As it is, I stayed in a terrible marriage full of lies and addiction more years than I should have because I was dependent on my husband for my children and me to live. I did get a small job that paid very little about 10 years ago, and I’ve worked there ever since, but it was not near enough to live on. Finally, after many years of prayer, God gave me the peace that He would take care of us, and I knew that my children and I could no longer live in such a toxic situation. Through many blessings from God and my wonderful support system of friends and family, we are out and finally feeling peace for the first time in years. I did get a new position where I worked, and I am making enough to live month to month, but there’s nothing leftover for savings or the future. At my age, even going back to school, I’m not sure what there will be for me, and I know I will never have the earning potential of my ex-spouse. But, the happiness and freedom my children and I feel now is worth living month to month and working until I’m 75 if I have to, just as a previous reply said. I only hope my children will see what I am facing now and will prepare themselves for the “if” that we all hope will never happen.

  5. tracihalpin says:

    Great advice! I told my teenager daughter to make sure she gets an education and a career, so she doesn’t have to depend on a man.

  6. nadine says:

    Wow, i must talk about this very subject until i am blue in the face and my stay at home mom friends look at me like i have a second head, then think oh, she’s pro working mom. I recommend you read, The Feminine Mistake (not mystique) by Leslie Bennetts, she discusses in detail this very thing and i try to refer friends to read it and at least here out the options with a full view of “what ifs”. And if it wasn’t too my dear wonderful grandmother (who worked during a time when when just didn’t work) who told me from an early age, that staying home was putting too much trust into one’s spouse, even though you loved them. My situation may have ended very differently. I took that advice she gave me and decided to continue to work thru the birth of my 2 children. After all, I had invested a great deal of money into my college education to NOT work. So the decision was made by me, and supported by my then husband. We found wonderful child care and i didn’t ever regret my choice. Then after my husband left our marriage after getting fired from his employer for having an affair with his secretary now wife #2. I couldn’t believe how important my choice in 2004 became. I was still hit financially but recovered fairly quickly i believe because i was employed full time in a career. Thanks for getting the word out to other women. Good article!

  7. Christina says:

    Sigh…where was that advice fourteen years ago? I will definitely be passing it down to my own children.

  8. Anonymous says:

    I am all for women equality. I am a women who has worked most of her teen and adult life; pursuing education that lead me to better career opportunities. Staying at home isnt for everyone. According to this article stay-home-partners can only depend on themselves. Distrust everyone else in your life, this article shames people who dont give into that fear. Can I always trust my spouse or partner? Yes I can, because it’s my choice to put faith in the character of my partner. My husband and I have a completely different story than the author of this article. This article is not spouting a cookie cuter example for every partnership.. but it is fear mongering. I want more info about marriage, trust and financial goals. What do I get? An article that says you can only trust yourself, not the character of others. That’s the world’s lie. Why not instead of scrapping and hiding funds, invest in the people around you, people who want to see a partnership thrive. Are you saying those people don’t exist? What an insult. What happened to trust openness vulnerability in marriage as characteristics of marriage that help you and your partner be a real team? What is wrong with building trust with the person you are married to? This article would have us believe it is wrong with their biased veiw, focusing on marriage, partnership or teams who work together will eventually disinergrate over time. Of course we all have one guarantee in life, we will die. Playing on fears people have either experienced themselves or may experience in the future with teammate, partner or spouse- I am not discounting that those events don’t happen to people but there are many stay home partnership that work because of trust and vulnerability. Why discount those good examples and where is the hope? This article is about YOU and how YOU can depend upon YOU. Take this article with a grain of salt or two. Instead of making a contingency for when your divorce happens. Prevent it from happening by trusting your spouse and surrounding yourself with a community that wants to see your family thrive.

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