The Spark

I remember well the first time I felt that spark. My husband had left only months before and I was still reeling from the loss. I knew that I wanted to love again, to be in love again,  but, at the time, that desire felt like an impossible dream. I was beginning to question whether I still contained the capacity to feel passion. To bond. To trust. My world was filled with pain and pain was the only language I was fluent in.

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10 thoughts on “The Spark

  1. emotionless brain – I am a regular person who lives a regular life. Along with being a regular individual I am also a very special person... In my life story I am divorced, raising two children (alone), without any family to speak of. These ramblings are trials and tribulations of my every day life. I hope it is as therapeutic for you to read as it is for me to write. Enjoy!
    emotionless brain says:

    You give me hope, sadly my “spark” from this summer is gone. Perhaps someday again.

  2. I believe the spark I feel is as real as anything I’ve ever felt. Deep. Burning. Inexhaustible. Sadly, she doesn’t feel the same way…and it has broken my heart all over again.

    1. Oh, the sparks are real alright. It’s just that they do not always have staying power. So much of it is about timing – for both partners.

      Fractures do heal; be kind and patient with yourself.

  3. Love how you describe the “spark”. After 24 years of marriage I forgot how that felt. The feeling is definitely intoxicating and it consumes you. I had to take a few steps back to realize that my “spark” did not want the same as I did. I also agree that I need to work on me.

  4. Newbeginning2day – Until recently I could describe myself in a few simple words: devoted mother & wife. That is how I saw myself and I was perfectly content with what my consisted of. Then, one day my whole world changed and everything that I thought defined me and my life was ripped away. After 15 years of what seemed to be a happy marriage I found myself facing infidelity and eventually separation from my husband. I started this blog as a way to release the thoughts swirling in my head during this difficult transition in my life. I'm finding solace in the words shared by other people experiencing divorce, separation and infidelity and I hope that as my journey continues and I flourish in spite of the roadblocks I'm confronting now that someone starting this difficult path will find solace in my words.
    Newbeginning2day says:

    I think I experienced a “spark” the other day with an acquaintance I’ve known for a long time. The difference is that now I’m getting divorced an am actually available. The problem…he’s has a history with my best friend so he’s off limits. And more importantly, I’ve only been separated officially since April so I’m definitely nowhere near comfortable, let alone ready, to date, at any level of seriousness. Frankly, it terrified me and intrigued me at the same time. After 17 years I completely forgot what it’s like to feel that spark or to even be looked at that way. I don’t know what to think of that experience but it gave me hope!

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