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Missing

9 Responses

  1. Steve Kubien says:

    Now this is something I never considered… Will I, someday, “miss” some member of my ex’s family?

    I always got along with her parents, brother, uncles/aunts and cousins but I certainly never felt really close to them. Not that I didn’t try. Her father is an alcoholic (almost 15yrs dry) & her mother was the stereotypical wife of an alcoholic…quiet, insecure, blinders on and an enabler. A denier. It was tough to get to know her (even after 20 years).

    The rest of her family is full of similar situations… Drinking men & the insecure women that they mentally & emotionally abused. A heap of sexism too. I’ve often wondered how much of how they exist is because of the booze & general sexism or the culture that is typical French Canadian, Catholic family life? I suppose they feed each other.

    On second thought, I doubt I’ll ever miss them.

    • My ex’s family had some of that same alcoholic flavor that also made them difficult to get to know. Nonetheless, they were at heart good people with good intentions. Although I have thought about them out of concern many times, this was the first time I truly missed my mother in law. You never know.

  2. maria5125 says:

    I miss my ex-mother-in-law too! We were very close, she would come visit and stay with us for months and since my ex worked a lot it was normally her and I and the kids for most of that time. Since he moved out 1,5 years ago I’ve talked to her maybe 3 times and it’s been short, wishing happy birthday’s… I don’t know what he’s told her so I have no idea what she’s thinking about the whole thing.

  3. what a beautiful post. i think few people ever talk about this–it’s not just your husband you lose and miss, but an entire extended family as well. it’s very to easy to become nostalgic for some of the traditions/experiences you had with the ex in-laws as they often shape and affect you in profound ways.

  4. This is a sincere and heartfelt post. I grieved so much for his side of the extended family after he left me; and in particular his sister who I was very close to. We try and keep in touch, but it can never be the same.

  5. It is so easy to believe we live in a vaccum and when we are relieved of the burden of a horrendous relationship there is such relief. But your blog reminded me of just how deep the levels of our love flow.

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