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Radical Gratitude

33 Responses

  1. Very brave and honest. It’s true that sometimes we have to have some very negative experiences in order to grow and earn better relationships. I feel the same way about what I had to learn, too. Thanks for sharing.

  2. Greg says:

    Wow! That IS radical! I might just challenge myself to do write something similar about my ex… Might…

  3. I couldn’t help but read this from your future husband’s perspective. Truth is, if I were him, I would totally not be cool with this, especially #6. I’m guessing he’s a very good man. Better than me.

  4. Bravo!! Beautifully written. I have so much anger and resentment in my current marriage (even though I’m committed to staying in it) that I struggle to find the good in it. Reading this post made me think about the wonderful things I’ve experienced in my marriage and how wonderful my husband was (pre addiction) and how wonderful he is now. I wish I could erase the 7 years in between. But like you I had no idea anything was askew.

    I agree with you about #6. I would have no issue knowing my spouse was once in a sexually healthy relationship. It beats sexual dysfunction.

  5. gemmautting says:

    Lisa – I love everything about this – the radicalness of it, the truth, the bittersweet, the all of it. LIke Greg above – maybe I can be inspired by you to try this on my lingering negativity about my Dad’s long-term secret affair which I found out about late in life and am having a hard time forgiving. Still feeling “loyal” to my Mum, long after they are both dead. But I think you’ve shown me a way…

  6. Aaron says:

    You are a better soul than I am; if I was pressed to say anything nice about my ex I’d have a very hard time. Good on you for being able to focus on the positive. I might steal your idea for a future post. 🙂

  7. Brave post. Did it make you feel lifted up afterwards?
    That the years with him were worthwhile?

    • I was lucky. I never spent time in a bad marriage. It was wonderful and then it was over. The hard part is not knowing what was real. I’ve come to realize that it was real enough to me and that’s what matters.

      It is freeing. I am relieved to be in a place where the horrible end doesn’t erase the rest.

  8. Wow! I am impressed, and going to try.

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