I visited my local Starbucks the other day to enjoy some coffee and free Wi-Fi. I was engaged in relatively simple research, so I let my ears wander to the conversations around me. One in particular caught my attention, as it pertained to my current status as a bride-to-be. There was a large group at the table across from me — a young engaged couple, parents, wedding planners (yes, plural) and a priest. The plans they were making were as detailed and complex as those made for a presidential inauguration.
We hear so much about wedding planning. There are entire industries built around helping the couple carry out their “perfect day.” It’s easy to get carried away in the romance and the idea that a single ceremony represents the entirety of a relationship. It’s easy to confuse the ability to control the details of a day with the potential for controlling an entire life. It may be easy, but like the eyes of the audience at a magic show, it is attention focused in the wrong direction. Wedding days should be special; it is a time to celebrate your bond and make a public declaration of your relationship. However, don’t be so busy planning your wedding that you neglect to plan your marriage. Here are a few things to keep in mind for your Big Day, and the days (and years) after you say “I do.”
4 thoughts on “Planning a Marriage”
Thank you:) I’m honored.
You are correct that the planning should include some thinking about beyond the wedding. Hopefully, most people do discuss things about their dreams and yet, unfortunately for you and me, others, these things change. It is so hard to control or predict. We just have to learn to move forward, learning how to survive and protect our children, ourselves and make better choices.
It frightens me some times to learn how little some people have discussed with their spouse-to-be. A good friend and her ex husband never discussed if they wanted children before they got married! I’m the opposite – I put “no kids” on my Match profile:)